Nov 22,2018

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Before entering into an agreement with us, please read our terms and policy documents carefully. You will, for obvious reasons, not consult on this with your attorneys or advisors. This document is constructed of flash paper. Handle with care. Incinerate upon completion.

The party/client is hereby referred to as ‘you’ unless specified. We are referred hereby as ‘we’ unless specified.

1. You agree that you are the sole recipient of this document. These words are for your eyes only, or eye, for the matter. You agree to realize that we will know if a second pair claps eyes on this paper. The client understands that we are to be indemnified as per our current rates plus taxes, as per your country’s laws.

2. The client understands that you do not have access to our contact details unless you are someone very important, and in immediate, unpreventable danger. We are not your regular attorneys, henchmen- or the people you call to clean up everytime you make a mess. Once we are there, and you do not have a satisfactory cause for inviting our attention, we are gone. You would be on our watchlist, and will have to indemnify us under our current rates plus taxes, as per your country’s laws.

3. The client realizes that we are capable of solving any and all of your problems, regardless of the nature of such problems. We will do it within the stipulated time at the time of the first contractual payment. You will need not pay us anything in between unless specified, until the work in completed, and the time when we collect our last payments. Any issues related to payments can be referred to our H-Squad. As formidable they might sound, we always employ the best professionals. Expect solution within four business hours.

4. Any motive(s) detected to evade compensation towards the firm for its service(s) will be dealt in/out as per the assessment of the situation. There is a percentage that will be compounded for every issue(s) raised by you and will be collected with the final payment.

5. The client understands that after our relationship is completed, we will perform a small psychological session with the client(or family, wherever applicable) where you(and others) will be counseled on further procedures. The client also agrees to be subject to a minor hypnosis after the counselling to efface our organization secrets from your brain. You are also giving us the rights to search your premises, your safes, lockers and properties offshore to detect any traces of pur company and efface them without prior intimation to the client.

6. Moral hazards rising of/during our relationship is strictly not within company policies. Your issues will be directed to the H-Squad and assessed, and dealt in/out accordingly, based on a percentage that will compound to your final payments.

7. You will be provided a relationship manager at all times who will have access to your emails, calls and public pay-phones you use, for confidentiality purposes.

8. The client agrees to let the firm place you under surveillance once your contract is in force and active. This surveillance will not be disclosed to the client for the safety of the client and client’s family.

9. The firm places strict norms on doing repeated business. One client can avail our services for one time only. A second request will cost you a percentage, and will be dealt in/out accordingly by our H-Squad as per our assessment.

10. For your safety, you will understand that we are watching you now. Any exercise of evasion or othwrwise is futile, and will cost you a percentage plus taxes according to your country’s laws.

11. The client understands that special packages are applicable on disappearance requests, including taxes of countries where you are shifting to.

If you agree to all this, sit tight. Our relationship executive will contact you shortly. If you do not, you can incinerate the paper and our surveillance will be removed. Maintain the secrecy and you will be fine.

We, Vanish.

The Lyrictrotter

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